When Self-Doubt Creeps In: What to Do When You Feel Like You're Not Enough

I’ll never forget the day I gave my first long speech in person. It was something I’d prepared for, prayed over, and practiced so many times I could nearly recite it in my sleep.

And then… I lost my place. Not once—twice.

I apologized to the audience, tried to remain calm, and kept going. But afterward, I couldn’t let it go. I replayed every second in my mind. I picked myself apart, wondering if I had ruined the whole thing. I beat myself up for not being perfect.

When I told my therapist about it, she gently asked, “Can you show yourself some self-compassion?”

I laughed—because that was literally a point in my speech. I had sat in front of the room and told the audience to give themselves grace… and yet I was sitting there struggling to give any to myself.

That moment reminded me: self-doubt doesn’t disappear just because we’re accomplished. Just because we’re doing brave things. Just because we look confident.

And when it does—especially for those of us in leadership or service roles—it can feel like we’re living a double life.

You’re the one others look to for answers, strength, or inspiration. You’re the one offering encouragement, showing up strong, putting on the polished face. And yet, beneath all that, you might be quietly asking yourself…

“Am I really qualified to be doing this?”

“What if they see through me?”

“What if I’m not as capable as they think I am?”

That feeling? It has a name—imposter syndrome—and it’s far more common than we think, especially among high-achieving women.

But here’s the truth: self-doubt doesn’t mean you’re a fraud. It means you’re human.

It means you care deeply. It means you’re growing. It means you’re stepping into places that stretch you.

And yes, it’s possible to feel unsure and be a powerful leader at the same time.

So what do we do when doubt shows up in the middle of our calling?

When it whispers just loud enough to make us second-guess ourselves?

We don’t shrink back. We slow down, tell the truth, and reconnect—with ourselves and with the One who called us.

Here are a few tools that help me, especially on the days when I feel like I’m not enough:

Put Pen to Paper

When your inner critic is loud, write back with the truth.

Grab a journal and make a list of the things you’ve overcome, the wins (big or small), and the ways you’ve shown up for yourself and others. Don’t just think about them—write them by hand.

Why pen to paper? Studies show that handwriting improves memory recall and emotional processing far more than typing. It helps your brain internalize what you’re saying. So when you write, “I am proud of myself for showing up,” your brain hears you—and believes you.

This practice isn’t about ego. It’s about reminding yourself that you’re not starting from scratch—you’re starting from experience.

Speak to Yourself Like You Would a Friend

When I lost my place in that speech, I kept saying to myself: “You messed it up. You looked unprepared. You should’ve done better.”

But what if a friend told me the same story? I’d say, “You did great. You kept going. That took guts.”

So why not offer that same kindness to ourselves?

Self-compassion is not letting yourself off the hook—it’s letting yourself be human. It’s believing you can grow without being cruel to yourself along the way.

Do Something You’re Good At

When self-doubt creeps in, confidence can feel a mile away. But God didn’t create you to live in a constant state of questioning your worth. Sometimes, building confidence starts with simply remembering what you’re capable of—with His help.

Try doing something that reminds you of your God-given gifts and strengths.

Maybe it’s cooking a nourishing meal, organizing your space to bring peace, helping a friend in need, or finally finishing that book you’ve been meaning to read.

These may seem small, but they matter. They’re reminders that you're not broken—you’re growing through grace. They help shift your thoughts from “What’s wrong with me?” to “Look at what God and I can do together.”

Pause and Pray

When I start spiraling in my thoughts, I know I need to slow down and reconnect. I often turn to this scripture:

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”— 2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV)

That verse reminds me that fear doesn’t get to drive. I was created with power. I have access to peace. I can choose a sound mind.

Even when I mess up. Even when I feel like I’m not enough. Especially then.

The Bottom Line

We all have moments where we doubt ourselves. But that doesn’t mean we’re not capable. It doesn’t mean we’re not ready. It doesn’t mean we don’t belong.

So if you’ve been hard on yourself lately—pause. Reflect. Be kind. Write it out. Laugh when it’s ironic. Cry when it’s needed. And remind yourself: You’re still becoming. And you’re doing better than you think.

I’m on this road with you.